Does Karma actually exist?

A friend of mine wrote "Karma does Exist" on her facebook the other day, then this very question "Does Karma actually Exist?" suddenly crossed my mind right after I read the statement. However the question seemed to be too hard to answer without raising pros and cons, unlike those math problems which you can easily solve clearly and of course without any doubts.

Then I asked my self a much simpler question, "Do I really believe in Karma?". Well this one was easy as I refer to someone's personal idea of a certain issue. My answer was: "No, I don't." Let me tell you why. In my very own opinion, I believe what one has done in their lives is absolutely under their own control with GOD's permission. There is no way Karma will get in the way. Yes, if you think of those examples given to assure you that Karma does exist, you may find it possible. But to me, they are merely trying to deceive the concept.

Let me get this clear. In Karma's world, they recognize positive and negative karma. Positive karma is when one receives a good thing as an impact of the virtue they have done somewhere in the past. So something like rewards for those good boys or girls. Meanwhile, there is this negative karma which leads you to the concept of you are the victim of your own misdeeds. It gives you this idea that no body will get hurt by your mischieve but you yourself at the end. Either way, we can simply put karma as the noun of "what goes around, comes around." I know it is kind of ringing the bell when you heard the phrase.

So, karma, to me, was designed to make people believe that every single thing in life does count. It was a concept which was created to control people to do the right things. It was an invisible burden consisting of fear and guilt which is put on the shoulder of those people who seem to not fully understand the meaning of life.

Now ask me the former question again, "Does Karma actually Exist?" I have no idea. 

so much for fairy tales!

YES! You've got a crush, you fall in love, you date, you get along, you fight, you part, you move on, you've got another crush, you fall again, and so on! Those happen, right? I mean, it's always been that repetitious cycle. Many people, even perhaps, every body has been there, some even have been there for like hundreds time before they finally make it. Things are utterly unpredictable with this so called love. Sometimes you feel so damn confident with your security, but in the end you've still got to face the loss which sucks of course.

But hey, isn't it good to be given the chance to acknowledge so many different states about life? So that if your daughter one day told you how miserable it felt to be left behind, you would confidently be able to tell her how to get rid of it. Besides, imagine if one has never fallen in love or say, had a crush on somebody, how odd is that? how boring life can be? Rather a bore, isn't it? I mean, crush is one of those stuff that keeps you going to school excitedly and gleefully, right? Without it life would be a total crap. Well, OK, that's when I was a school girl. Now I go to school excitedly as I think it would be a lot boring if I stayed home the whole day, like the WHOLE day. But that doesn't mean that I go to school as I have no other option. NO! I love school! I adore my students, and I believe they adore me too. But it's just that other type of love we're talking about here. You know what I mean, don't you?

Anyway, the awful thing about this love life is we tend to expect this fairy tale's happy ending for ours. Excuse me? Doesn't anybody ever tell you that not all fairy tales have a "happily ever after"? Sometimes it's just a "once upon a time". Yes, I know it's sometimes very hard to deal with, but at least you have the memories. No body can take that away from you, not even your lost lover. So just face it! You cannot have all good stuff, but at least you can still see the good side. Try to be wise to yourself, will you?

sometimes...small things mean big!

I was having this school bulletin meeting with the kids when I learnt the best lesson which most people probably ignore. I was to read the job description that every body on the board should do for the upcoming edition. When it came to this creativity part, one of the kids with her eyes filled with tears suddenly said "No, I'm not doing it again." I was a bit surprised at her unexpected retort as it was really unusual of her.

So I asked her the reason and she, nearly cried, said: "I'm not doing it because I know where my last project ended in- a trash can! I saw it! It was in that trash can near the toilet. So I'm not doing it again" I felt very sorry for this look of disappointment on her face. It made me feel like I was the worst and the meanest person on earth though I wasn't actually the one who threw her project away.

Now I shall always remember that no matter how small one has done, try to appreciate it as if it were the best thing ever. Because you'd never know if your praise would give them such encouragement to do things better. And another lesson I learnt is "always have your trash can covered!"

When we prefer to keep silent...

Have you noticed that some of your buddies sometimes are so persistent in keeping their mouths shut in spite of the insistence on doing the opposite? They will keep what's going on in their minds confidential even if it were the end of the world. I do that sometimes too. And hey, there's nothing wrong about it, is it?

What is wrong is those who keep insisting on telling us that things are going to be easier if we open our mouths and just blurt out everything. Well it may be correct on one occasion, but obviously it won't be the same on others. We have reasons for every single thing we do, and so does our decision to remain silent.

So for you who think you are or you know a person with this sort of qualification, just remember one thing: the reason I don't talk is because I keep thinking if I wanted to then I would. So please just stay out of it!

I Love You! (well, I'm not just saying!)

This statement has become one of those things you can hear and say very easily. 'I love you, mum!' 'I love you, dad!' 'I love you, honey!'. But how about saying the words for the first time to the one you have a huge crush on? What is behind this  kind of "I love you" statement?

Well, letting the one you love secretly know about your feeling is something special. It has discourse in it! When you say "I love you", it might mean:

• hey, I love you! Can we go out on a date? Are we officially in a relationship now?
• hey, I love you! Tell me your feeling! Do you love me too?
• hey, I love you! I wish to hear it back from you!
• hey, I love you! You don't have to do anything, it's more than enough to let you know.
• hey, I love you! If you don't feel the same, stop acting like you do!
• hey, I love you! If you don't feel the same, I'll just go and get another guy to love me!

So, which one is your "I love you"? xx

wajar saja...

Kenapa seseorang terkadang menjadi marah saat mendengar perkataan orang lain? Karena dia mendengar sesuatu yang tidak disukainya, terlepas itu benar atau tidak. Manusia memang mempunyai kecenderungan ingin mendengar apa yang ingin dia dengar. Saat apa yang didengar ternyata adalah sebaliknya, maka akan terjadi sebuah penolakan dalam dirinya. Penolakan tersebut bisa diungkapkan dalam bentuk penyangkalan, pembelaan, pembenaran dan berbagai cara yang lain.

Hal ini sangat wajar karena memang tidak mudah menerima sesuatu yang tidak kita harapkan. Seperti aku yang tidak mudah menerima ketidaksimetrisan daun telingaku, seperti seorang sahabat yang tidak mudah menerima ketidakseimbangan postur tubuhnya, seperti seorang kenalan yang tidak mudah menerima keadaan finansialnya, ataupun seperti seorang tetangga yang tidak mudah menerima ketidakmampuan mengurus anak-anaknya. Itulah manusia, tidak mudah menerima kekurangannya, meskipun bukan berarti tidak bisa.

Dan kenapa tidak mudah juga mendengar seseorang membicarakan kekurangan kita? Karena kita tahu mereka benar dan kita tidak mempunyai senjata apapun untuk menyangkalnya. Padahal sebuah kebenaran memang tidak perlu disangkal, melainkan diterima. Kenyataannya, itulah satu-satunya cara untuk 'meladeni' omongan-omongan tersebut. Dan sekali lagi, 'menerima' bukanlah perkara gampang, setidaknya bagi beberapa orang. Jadi kalau kita marah, itu wajar saja. Yang tidak wajar adalah kalau kita tidak berusaha mengendalikan amarah tersebut. Selamat berjuang!

The English Ladies Part 2

I just got home and I feel a bit rubbish! We've been doing some very exciting things during the weekend. We went around the villa on Saturday night which was quite good, but I didn't really enjoy it as I was a bit feverish. I was struggling with the cold so badly. We managed to have some cold drink though ( well Vicky and Anne did, I had a glass of hot lemon which was not very nice) at a cafe near the villa.

On Sunday morning we went to the waterfall. It was a pity that we didn't see any monkeys there. The last time Vicky and I came, there were loads of them. Now they seemed to be hiding somewhere, all of them! I was a bit sorry for Anne, she did expect to see them.

Next we headed the second waterfall which was not very far, yet it required some energy as it is very hilly up there. It has been always easy to go down, but it feels so much difficult when we go up! The waterfall is rather the same, it's not worth the walk- just my personal account! When we got at the villa, it was like 1 o'clock. Everybody wass hungry. So Riris and I cooked. I can't believe I did it quite well. Both Anne and Vicky love 'dadar jagung'. They said it was the best Javanese food they had had so far.

Here are some pictures we managed to take. Happy Sunday, fellas!

The English Ladies

So it was a quarter past ten in the evening when the car which would take me to the airport came. Off I went, all by myself, well I did have the driver but he is not actually a friend of mine, isn't he? We got to the airport at about eleven which means I had to wait for an hour as the flight was supposed to land at five minutes after midnight. Lucky me it landed twenty five minutes earlier!

I looked at every person who came out of the a arrival door and I got worried as it had been almost an hour but I hadn't seen either Vicky or Anne. I kept wondering whether they would show up at all. And thank God they popped finally!

It was so good to see Vicky again! She was lovely, as always, and I could see Anne right behind her. Then we did a quick hug and headed the parking lot. Off we left the airport at a half past twelve at midnight.

First day at school was good. Anne had two classes while Vicky had only one. We went to the orphanage in the afternoon, joining the first and the second graders breaking the fast. Second day was today. We had one class which was in the fifth grade. We talked about weather which was exciting. Then we went to Surabaya. Anne bought herself a cute ring, it has Bali thing on it.

In the afternoon we went swimming. Well I did not swim, Vicky and Anne did. Then we had dinner at this food terrace next to our school. We had 'nasi bebek'! Vicky did order for us. She said "nasi bebek tiga" and it sounded really funny. I bet you see the picture already! I didn't manage to take many pictures, but promise I will have more and more! We are going to the waterfall up in the mountain this Sunday. It should be fun! xx

The Discourse between us!

"It's hot in here!" adalah sebuah kalimat yang diucapkan oleh salah satu dosen di kelas Discourse Analysis beberapa tahun lalu yang masih aku ingat dengan baik. Kalimat ini dengan sangat jelas menggambarkan sebuah contoh discourse yang bisa diartikan sebagai sebuah permintaan tolong untuk melakukan suatu tindakan mengenai suhu ruangan yang panas, either it is to turn on the air conditioning or to open the window if it doesn't have one.

Buat kamu yang mungkin baru pertama kali mendengar istilah Discourse Analysis ini, begini aku memahaminya. Discourse Analysis adalah bagaimana cara kita memahami sebuah interaksi sosial. Yang menjadi objeknya adalah setiap bentuk komunikasi tertulis ataupun lisan. Discourse Analysis memungkinkan kita untuk memahami motivasi tersembunyi dibalik sebuah tulisan ataupun ucapan seseorang sehingga komunikasi bisa berjalan dengan baik dan efektif. Or in other words, discourse analysis will help us interpret what the writer or speaker actually intends to convey. 

Contoh singkatnya seperti kalimat "It's hot in here!" yang sudah aku tulis di awal. Si pembicara dalam hal ini tidak hanya sedang membuat sebuah pernyataan mengenai suhu suatu ruangan. Melainkan ada maksud tersembunyi yang cukup jelas yang coba disampaikan olehnya, yaitu meminta seseorang untuk melakukan suatu tindakan yang bisa mengurangi suhu panas ruangan tersebut. Jadi ini bukanlah merupakan sebuah pernyataan yang membutuhkan penegasan berupa "yes, it is" tapi lebih kepada sebuah permintaan tolong seperti "would you please turn on the air conditioning? it's hot in here". So in this matter, we are expected to do the action. 

Well I think enough about the explanation. I'm not the expert myself, but it's always worth a try, isn't it? What I'm trying to say is alangkah enaknya kalau semua orang pandai dalam Discourse Analysis. Komunikasi akan berjalan lancar, efektif dan tidak membuat capek. Pesan yang coba disampaikan pun akan sampai dalam kondisi yang rama seperti saat dikirimkan. Sayangnya, tidak semua orang bisa berteman baik dengan Discourse Analysis. Sehingga semua pesan yang coba aku sampaikan terkadang berakhir tidak lebih sebagai bualan, tidak berarti dan tidak dianggap. Bloody annoying!

Namun tidak bisa juga menyalahkan mereka yang 'tidak tanggap' situasi ini. Ada yang beranggapan bahwa discourse itu terjadi pada komunitas tertentu yang mempunyai latar belakang dan pola pikir yang sama. Mereka yang tidak memilikinya, tidak akan mampu memahami discourse yang muncul dalam interaksi sosial tersebut. To be honest, I'm not sure about that! But one thing I am sure about, discourse needs an interpretation, not an answer! Jawaban terkadang lebih banyak bermakna kiasan, hanya sebatas ucapan yang keluar dari mulut seseorang. Tapi penafsiran akan bermakna lebih dari itu. Dengan penafsiran, kita akan memahami bagaimana perasaan seseorang, apa yang dia harapkan dan bagaimana sebaiknya kita bertindak.

Jadi, sudah tahukah kamu apa yang ada di balik ucapan-ucapanku?

My Very Own Thoughts!

Hello! This time I would love to share my very own thoughts to you all! Mind this, you may NOT agree with some of them, yet this is my personal feeling about stuff. So take it easy! I have shared them mostly on facebook and twitter, now let me have them on the blog.

When you finally decides to fly, the gravity is no longer important. It is just something that reminds you of the ground.

Maybe I am not able to hear your footsteps, but I can still follow your footprints. So make sure you walk slowly, I probably catch up with you very soon.

Sometimes we don't talk in a way that anybody else does, but we know exactly what we mean to each other.

Love does tolerate mistakes, but love is not an excuse for them.

There is actually a huge difference between praise and compliments. Mostly, you should be careful with compliments, they sometimes end up insincere.

I just need to get you out of my mind. Your absence does drive me crazy, but your presence drives me crazy even more.

when you cannot change the system, just play dumb. But, it doesn't mean you may become a real dumb.

Girls should not act stupid in front of boys. It isn't cute at all!

Everytime I get hurt from doing what I think is right, I tell myself, "it's okay girl, short term pain, long term gain."

Personal relationship does make you emotionally fragile.

It takes a bunch of courage for girls to tell boys how they feel, and when they get let down because of that, boys will never ever hear from them again.

That's right, Baby. You ignite me then let me go. Then all you see is the shining beautiful colours of me. Oh yes, Baby. I'm that firework those people are talking about.

Dear girls, when boys ignore you,they actually give you more reason to believe the fact that they don't deserve your heart. Don't waste time, darling.

I'm moving on, Baby. Everything about you is so yesterday. Now I'm putting my prettiest dress and cutest shoes on , getting ready for Saturday Night.

‎"Yes, maybe you've lost a piece of puzzle. But somehow some where out there, there is another one that just fits the space it has left." I keep telling myself.

Life is a generous treat God has given you. So THANK YOU won't be that hard, will it?

Ironic the fact that they look at me whilst I look at you and you look at someone else.

I AM NOT and NEVER WAS interested in politics. To me it is a form of boring game played by those two-faced people. Just wait and see which face is more dominant.

Good girls' make up: 1) books = an eyeshadow, 2) recitation = a lipstick, 3) shame = a blush-on

‎1) being sexy without mini skirt, 2) being flirty without looking cheap, and 3) being sophisticated without arrogance. To all tpretty girls.

All this time my life has been a sentence ending in a 'comma', but when I look into your eyes, it eventually ends in 'a full'stop'. You're the one, none of them matters now.

Things that don't go together: number and me. Things that go together very perfectly: you and me, Honey!

You are this bad habit which I would love to break but just can't help carrying on doing.

If there was anything I fancy learning right now, that would be you. You've been like this hard lesson I just wouldn't be able to comprehend, at all.

Girls, when boys steal your hearts, make sure they give their hearts in return instead of returning your hearts to you.

For some girls, beauty is a matter of make-up, for some others it's a matter of what's inside, and for some, it's a matter of EVERYTHING

There's always one guy, no matter how many other come, only he who manages to make you smile.

As the time flies, you will stop mourning for the person. You will mourn for the time you have wasted to mourn that guy.

I like you because you have made me realize that there was an empty space in me which nothing could perfectly fill in but you.

I thought I could write anything I wanted on the blog. yet there are things I badly need to share but too private to tell.